Top Ten : Alt-Films
It’s a wonderful thing having all of these images rattling around in my head all day. So here’s a roundup no one asked for. Simply for the sake of getting it off of my chest because I probably have hundreds to list and recount.
The Point (1971)
The Point, (narrated by Ringo Starr and Dustin Hoffman, scored by Harry Nilsson - to name a few) tells the tale of a boy named Oblio the lone round-headed person in a kingdom where everything and everyone is pointed. Oblio is singled out for his differences and banished with his dog Arrow to the pointless forest. While there he discovers that even the Pointless Forest has a point. Little Oblio and Arrow venturing into the pointless forest is the ultimate hero’s journey.
2. Switchblade Sisters (1975)
This film makes an appearance in this list because, “Everybody’s gotta be in a gang.”
3. Reality Bites (1994)
What’s strange about this making the list is the fact that this film has been said to be definitive of Gen X. Despite this and being a proper Gen Z raised by Baby Boomers this film still hits home. In retrospect much of my upbringing in the Roaring Fork Valley seems to be like I was raised in an alternate universe set sometime before the internet in the 1990’s and was an amalgamation of Manhattan, Los Angeles, and a rural small town somewhere in the middle of nowhere. In all actuality I spent a great deal of time downloading music for cool ringtones on my hand-me-down Blackberry and when I dropped it into a toilet, my mom didn’t replace it and I spent several years without a cell phone. There’s nothing quite like hopping off of the chairlift - getting a call and hearing The Animals, Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood. Reality does indeed bite.
And honestly, I was never given a curfew. Me “disappearing” on the weekends was never a character flaw. Like, I don’t know what to tell you. Send me an email? If it’s dire I’ll have my people call your people.
4. Clerks (1994)
When I was 19 and recently dropped out of college I left California moved back home and found myself working at a vitamin grocery co-op. The moment I saw a woman sprawled out on a back aisle inspecting eggs on the floor I knew my twenties were about to be a wild ride. In this same store the week before Donald Trump was sworn into office in 2017 these old hippies came in droves and bought strange and exotic ingredients, and when asked what they were cooking up they all replied, “election stew, so the bad guy doesn’t win.” The day he won, it was like there was a dark cloud and an ominous presence in the store- all these old people moping around in their socks, sandals, and worn in Levi’s. All I could think was, “Who died?” And maybe that’s the day I became conservative, because there’s no way. Soup. Naur, election stew. Shortly after this I found myself working at a 7-Eleven a dream job I might add. I could skateboard to work, lived in the coolest victorian mansion in town, aptly named Starr Manor. Once an old pal walked in and said, “This feels like Clerks.” On top of all of this, Heaven Never Closes.
Almost no complaints. Many days I found myself there, when I wasn’t even supposed to be. But there was essentially an open bar, 401k plan, and an endless stream of characters. Meeting a Grand Wizard late at night and him telling me, “You’re alright in my book.” was flattering, and surprisingly not my last straw. My last straw was actually the man I also met late at night who I talked about the weather with. My manager Ronnie, came to work in the following days recounting a regular telling her about a Craigslist missed connection she’d read. That missed connection you might ask? Hannah loves the rain…
Welp. I’ll just see myself out there’s an $800 dollar van down by the river with my name on it, and turns out it’s whale migration season on the Oregon coastline. I will be voting Trump Vance 2024. NPR has been a bore since he left office. Every day for four years there was some excitement. And I miss that. I’d like America to be GREAT again.
The defunct 7-Eleven that is now a Carniceria. Too bad you can't, "Step into my office..."
5. The Little Mermaid (1976)
This Czechoslovakian adaptation of Hans Christian Andersen's The Little Mermaid, is a sumptuous treat. Disney could never.
6. Gummo (1997)
“Life is beautiful. Really, it is. Full of beauty and illusions. Life is great. Without it, you’d be dead.”
7. The Science of Sleep (2006)
I found this DVD in a bin of $5 movies at a Big Lots one evening after school while my mom shopped for various quirky home goods. It bears repeating that the 2008 recession may not have been my peak but it was one of the most idyllic times of my life, and I’m rather nostalgic. The Science of Sleep is tied as a favorite with Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I did also enjoy Michel Gondry’s Mood Indigo, although the latter are far more palatable.
8. SLC Punk (1998)
This is a VHS that has been rewinded in my VCR countless times. When I finally sat down and watched Easy Rider, the narrative seemed to land a bit more. Like, “Huh, SLC Punk is totally Easy Rider.” It also visually cues in my mind many scenes from The Young Ones. These might be abstract thoughts, but I think it makes sense. In many ways this film was also the precursor to managing complex grief and survivor’s guilt following the death of several close friends who all died in unusual ways and places. It also helped to be primed before showing up alone to Death Metal and Punk shows clad in a mini skirt and buttoned up cardigan; being asked, “Are you even into this kind of music?”. It’s okay to be a Mike. It’s also okay to pick up a set of clippers give yourself an Alice Dellal undercut and bleach your hair (40 volume) and paint dye into your hair with blue and then pink. It’s very liberating, highly recommend.
“ Wouldn’t it be more of an act of rebellion if you didn’t spend so much time buying blue hair dye and going out to get punky clothes? It seems so petty. I mean stop me if I’m being offensive- you wanna be an individual, right? You look like you’re wearing a uniform. I mean, you look like a punk. That’s not rebellion, that’s fashion. ”
9. Let the Right One In (2008)
Is this what true love is supposed to look like?
10. Slacker (1990)
This list wouldn’t be complete without it. Although the meandering conversations could have used a proper trigger warning that syndicated television commercial breaks shoved down my throat.